move ... discerning what the body needs
Over the past few weeks, I’ve been learning how to listen to my body.
To notice.
To respond.
To respond with care.
This week, something new emerged.
Not every signal means the same thing.
And not every reaction comes from the body.
When the mind is loud
This week, my body spoke to me in many ways.
Some friends invited my husband and me to a local outdoor concert on Friday night. The invitation excited me.
But we already had a full weekend planned.
We could have made it work.
When I first thought about going, I noticed a sense of urgency. A subtle fear of missing out. My body felt like it was lacking something it needed to survive.
But when I sat with the reality of our weekend and how exhausted my husband was after four days caring for his mom with Alzheimer’s, something shifted.
My body sighed.
It relaxed.
The urgency faded.
It became clear what we needed to do.
We took a rain check.
In that moment, it felt like my mind was a child, and my body was the adult who knew what was best.
Not all resistance is the same
I also noticed how my body responds differently to different tasks.
As someone who is naturally disciplined, I’ve often told my body to push through. To get things done, no matter what.
This week, I experimented with listening more closely.
As I reviewed my agenda, I noticed how my body reacted to each task.
Sometimes, I felt a sense of resistance.
But not all resistance meant the same thing.
In one case, I felt tension when I thought about working on a report.
At first, it seemed like I didn’t want to do it.
But when I paused, I realized something else.
It wasn’t dread.
It was timing.
My body was telling me it would be better to handle it later, when I had more time and fewer distractions.
The weight of unnecessary effort
In another moment, I planned to drive across town to pick up a specific item.
As I thought about it, my body felt heavy, like I was carrying a stone.
When I realized I could find a comparable item closer to home without fighting traffic or losing my evening, the heaviness disappeared.
My body felt immediate relief.
The task didn’t change.
But how I approached it did.
Responding with kindness
This week also reminded me how important kindness is in this process.
One night, I intended to finish a few tasks before bed.
But my body felt exhausted after traveling, driving home, and hosting a small dinner.
Instead of pushing through, I allowed myself to go to sleep early.
Another time, when I felt tenderness in my shoulder, I initially felt let down.
I wanted to do more. To push harder.
But instead, I chose curiosity.
I researched stretches. I adjusted my workouts.
My shoulder healed, and I continued training in a way that supported my body.
Listening without judgment
There was even a moment where I overindulged at a late dinner.
It would have been easy to blame my body for not handling it well.
Instead, I chose to listen.
My body wasn’t failing me.
It was teaching me.
Now I understand more clearly what it needs.
Learning the difference
This week, I began to understand something simple, but important.
The body is always communicating.
But it helps to learn the difference between:
urgency and truth
avoidance and timing
desire and need
The more we listen, the more we begin to recognize these nuances.
This week’s practice
Action: pause and ask
At some point today, when you feel a reaction to something, pause.
Ask yourself:
What is my body actually asking for right now?
Not what your mind is saying.
Not what you think you “should” do.
Just notice.
Then respond in a small, supportive way.
Reflection
The body is not trying to hold you back.
It is trying to guide you.
Consider this:
When I feel resistance, what might my body be trying to tell me?
Journal prompt
Choose one that resonates. Or explore all three if you have the space:
Option 1
When have I mistaken urgency or fear for something my body truly needed?
Option 2
How can I tell the difference between avoiding something and needing a different approach?
Option 3
What happens when I pause and get curious instead of reacting immediately?
Closing
You don’t have to figure everything out.
You can listen, and learn the difference over time.
Be well,
Jef
What You’ll Find Here
hello body … is a space for anyone learning to listen to and collaborate with their body in pursuit of better health, not perfect health.
I’m especially interested in helping readers cultivate calm, connection, movement, nourishment, and rest through small, sustainable changes that support a meaningful life.
Here, you will find:
• Weekly reflections grounded in lived experience
• Simple practices to support calm, connection, movement, nourishment, and rest
• Plain-language insights that make health and wellness more accessible
• Journal prompts and reflections to support awareness and compassionate change
• A warm, honest space where your body is treated as an ally, not a problem to solve
I am glad you are here.
Work With Me
I’m a Mayo Clinic Certified Wellness Coach, a National Board Certified Health & Wellness Coach, and a Martha Beck Certified Wayfinder Life Coach. I work with clients one-on-one who want to build a healthier relationship with their bodies and create sustainable change.
If you feel disconnected from your body, overwhelmed by conflicting health advice, or ready for a kinder approach to well-being, you do not have to figure it out alone.
You can learn more about coaching with me here:
Learn more about coaching with me
Explore My Other Substacks
If this space resonates with you, you may also enjoy my other writing:
Wayfinding for the Directionally Challenged
Reflections on navigating reinvention, identity, purpose, and the ongoing work of becoming fully yourself.
Find Yourself at Home
Crafting living spaces that nourish and support who you are and who you are becoming.
If someone came to mind while reading, you’re welcome to share this with them.